Joooooohn... Jooooooohn... Joooooooohn... JOHN!

Look! :D

I finally finished part one of my nanowrimo story.

Isn't it fantastic?

Isn't it brilliant?

Isn't it amazing?

...What about my nicotine patches? Stupid John, they don't have anything to do with this! This is brilliant! ...Don't you think so?

Come ooooon. Of course it is! It only means that I'm going to have to keep writing in December and possibly January. But that hardly matters, does it? I do nothing else with my time apart from lie around and stare at the wall and carry out experiments that I can see are starting to get on your nerves...

Besides! 50,000 words is about what The Great Gatsby is. Fantastic novel, but it is a little short, isn't it? Come on, admit it! It is! So! My point isssss that this story needs a hell of a lot more than just 100 pages, right? RIGHT! The first part may be done: but it's missing a bucket load of crap. When a week is meant to pass, only a day passes. And all sorts of other silly things, you see?

Anyway. Part one finished and it rounds up to 33,770 words, right? So that means the other ones are going to be around that much, right? You still with me, John? Good. I don't want to have to twirl you around again. That was silly. It aids concentration, of course, but you informed me after the twirling in question that it was silly. So, therefore, it is silly... Oh, to hell with it.

MUCH BETTER! How are you feeling John? ...John? JOOOOOHN! Ah, there you are. AS I WAS SAYING: there are four parts. Summer, Autumn, Winter and Spring. Summer for happiness, Autumn for change, Winter for melancholy and Spring for new beginnings. Spring is short, though. Very short. I'll coin it up to about, say, 5,000 words?

So. The first three parts (I'm deducing) will round up to about 35,000 words once I've written and edited them. Plus the 5,000 of the fourth part. That gives you about 110,000. That's depending on how it all turns out. They could end up longer or shorter. Who knows. I know you certainly don't. I mean, look at you. Look at that vacant expression. You haven't the foggiest idea of what is going on.

But don't worry, my dear Watson! I know what's going on! *taps forehead* Massive intellect, you see? But, anyway, 110,000 is over 200 pages, I guess. Is that alright?... Well, no, not really. Yes, yes, I'm done rambling now. You may go to bed... But if you plan on replacing my skull, then you're going to have to get used to this sort of thing... and stop giving me that look. I mean, really, John: it's only 1am. Be happy I didn't wake you up at 4am. Even I know that is a hour that should not exist... wait, what are you doing? Well, of course you're going to bed, but you're forgetting something! ...Goodnight, John *makes heart shape with fingers*